i make, therefore i am

I’m not here to make pretty art, I’m here to be real.

Polished artworks everywhere, pretty colors, catchy quotes… honestly, I’d much rather show you something rough and raw than fake something “beautiful” just to be liked.

I don’t think i’ve actually felt happy yet. Sometimes I convince myself maybe selling my work will fix it… but does not selling anything really mean I’m miserable?

Sometimes I imagine myself creating something no one cares about, something people don’t even find cool, just so I can become insanely good at it — like… truly great — and not give a damn what anyone thinks because I’d know I was good at it.

You can look at my photos, ignore them, whatever… I’ll still make them. I don’t need you to applaud or validate me. I just need to make art. I could do something else, but I’ll keep creating anyway.

Can you become absolutely brilliant at your craft without needing anyone to validate it? like, I want to be an incredible artist, but I honestly don’t need anyone else to agree.

Do you think Diane Arbus cared? do you think Francesca Woodman would have stopped taking photographs just because someone told her she wasn’t “good enough”? do you think Van Gogh would have quit after his first rejection if someone told him there was no point in painting hundreds of canvases?

Of course not. They created because they had to, and that’s why people still talk about their work generations later.

Yeah, this is me. Learning random stories about other artists who just kept going… because maybe one day, someone will see my work and feel something real, something honest, not just another pretty picture.

“Pretty” doesn’t really move me… but truth always hits different. Maybe I’m not happy yet, but art makes it easier to breathe. Maybe it won’t ever pay my bills, but does being broke really mean failure if I get to make art every day?

I think I’ll always feel more alive creating without money than being rich and empty without it.